I got this article in my e-mail this morning and thought it was really interesting, and very true.
I get these e-mails weekly from this counseling workshop that Nate and I attended a couple years ago.
Attitudes That Harm a Healthy Relationship: Criticalness
"In recent Encouragement Emails, Dr. Ted Baldick from the Healing for Men workshop staff explored a number of attitudes that help develop a healthy relationship. He discussed respect, affirmation, validation, honesty and forgiveness and outlined their positive effect on relationships.
In the same way, there are four attitudes that are predictive of severe marital conflict and even divorce when they're consistently present.
The first one is being critical, which is an attitude that is characteristic of our sin nature. Criticalness is when we're quick to point out what is wrong with someone, his or her ideas, or behavior. It's an ongoing attitude of finding what is wrong, not what is right, in the other person.
What makes this attitude so insidious is that the offender (the critical person) often presents this attitude in the context of trying to help the other individual to be a "better person." In reality, criticizing is rarely helpful.
Criticalness prohibits building another up; it is a method of tearing down the other's character. Criticalness is more about seeking control than reconciliation. Usually, the critical person lives in a world of resentment.
Is a critical spirit harming those you love?"
Written by Ted Baldick
I'm guessing I'll find out the other three in future e-mails.
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